Cold, Cold Mountain


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November 11th, 2009

Cold, Cold Mountain

TimThinking of all the new power-ups in NSMBWii started to really get the creative juices flowing for me and Ray. We almost went with a Propeller Suit idea (still might happen if we can sort out the details), but we couldn’t get away from the idea of having little baby penguins suffering this horrible fate. Why is that so funny to us? We’re just sick and twisted like that I guess…

RayWow, this ended up a lot more messed up than I thought it would.


  1. blaster says:

    I admit it.
    I didn’t get it.

    • D3vin says:

      Mario killed the Mother penguin and is now wearing her as a power-up.

      • pcargill says:

        i wonder what powers THIS one has? if its just sliding on ice the blue shell could have done it, and lack of flight isnt really a power, he can already swim without needing to breathe (definitely comic worthy), does he peck people?

      • Ward says:

        It shoots ice balls that freeze foes. It’s basically the polar opposite of the fire flower. GET IT!? POLAR?!!

      • D3vin says:

        Basically it’s like the difference between the Raccoon leaf and Tanooki Suit, but this time it is the Ice flower and the Penguin suit, The Penguin suit has the ice ball throwing, but also sliding and better swimming…

        I still would have opted for an otter suit 😛

      • Dominator_101 says:

        I don’t think an otter suit could beat the awesomeness of the Tanooki suit. The Kuriboh Shoe comes close, though.

      • Talduras says:

        “I still would have opted for an otter suit”

        Does this explain your new avatar? 😉

      • Gadoink says:

        No, D3vin’s just always been an otter.

  2. D3vin says:

    You sick weirdos you…
    it needs more blood to get the idea across,
    But I do like the touches of the return of the logo on the overalls and the Penguin’s tears turning into icicles.

    • TatteredRagDoll says:

      Personally I think the bloody foot prints are subtle enough to get the point across .

      • D3vin says:

        I’m (slightly) colorblind, they just look darker, until looking at it closer I noticed the red-ish color in the first two footprints more of a hidden detail than anything…

    • Talduras says:

      What does the logo say anyway? I know what you are referring to, but I’m afraid my monitor (er, TV) isn’t high enough resolution to see such small details. Wish I had my MacBook out so I could use the Mac OS X zooming (Firefox zooming doesn’t cut it… too pixelateous).

  3. Talduras says:

    I get the joke… after my brain dumped its RAM, fired up the CPU, and did an extensive search based on the words “Mario” and “penguin.” But I’m going to have to agree with Ray when he said the following:

    “Wow, this ended up a lot more messed up than I thought it would.”

    I feel the same. Sadly, I had a wry grin on my face when I did get the joke, so now I’m afraid we both must seek professional mental help and need to stay away from P.E.T.A. members for a week.

    *Sniff*Waaaaaaaah! This is the saddest event to happen to me since the day I lost my Weighted Companion Cube. :*(

    • aghhdjgdjkfhgtahdugihila; says:

      Awwwwwwwww! I don’t like this one. It’s too… evil. And I feel the same way about my WCC!

    • Kree says:

      Not in cruelty,
      Not in wrath,
      The REAPER came today.
      An ANGEL visited this gray path
      And took the cube away.

  4. randomperson says:

    poor poor penguins and now i get the name of this comic cold, cold mountain like cold as in evil

    Tim no one has any idea what goes on in your mind if you made a propeller one it would most likely have lugi in the propeller upgrade and toad trying to grab on to the propeller but he is higher up so the propellers rip him up 2 days later every one is there at a funeral for toad and Luigi d

    so that would be my idea for the comic if you did a propeller

    first there were 2 toads then there are 1

  5. pcargill says:

    *monotone voice* how dare he? and how dare you for thinking this up? and how dare animal cruelty not do anything?

  6. Supersonic24 says:

    Wow… this is definitely one of the darker, if not darkest comic. I LOVE IT! I hope you guys do more of this kind of joke in the future, kind of an insight of what you’re actions in the game mean.

  7. Batty1580 says:

    Wow…..that is sad.

    Poor little penguins. But, if it helps Mario then im sure I can get over it. What really worries me is that first, I got thejoke from the start (and I dont know a thing about the new game) and it made me laugh.
    Maybe im just as twisted as you guys are.

    PS watch out for angry mobs and animal protection agencies

  8. Kvb says:

    If this had been any other webcomic, it probably would have been a lot easier to get the joke.

    This is the kind of humor you just don’t expect from 2P Start.

  9. MetaRidleyR27 says:

    Nice Comic Guys, but that was surprisingly dark, especially by 2P START! standards.

  10. steve-ohs says:

    Nice yet slightly disturbing comic guys. poor little penguins.
    For some reason, i feel like this would be the great front for a christmas card. the inside can say “Wishing you and your family a wonderful Holiday Season”.

    • moonjuice7 says:

      I Would find that disturbing yet absolutely hilarious. And yes, everyone who views this web comic is now on PETA’s hit-list. Beware.

  11. moonjuice7 says:

    Oh, and nice logo too. (but it wasn’t better than the comic)

  12. shonen413 says:

    Peta is very dissaponted!

  13. Dry Bones says:

    NCG. It is darker than the average 2P Start comic, but I wouldn’t call it disturbing. Maybe it’s just me.

    What song is Mario singing? It’s been awhile since I’ve had to read music.

  14. Mikallein says:

    It took me a sec to get it,but when i did i went “awwww” then i loled.

  15. The Gastronomic Gamer says:

    Very different from your usual stuff and that’s why I like it. I’m glad that you guys are pushing your limits while still keeping it cute. By making it a little twisted, you managed to make it interesting.

  16. BadnikHunter says:

    When I first saw it, I didn’t really get it. Then I saw the bloody footprints…

  17. Snifit says:

    Wow….just wow.
    I saw the preview image of Mario holding the baby penguin and expected something light and adorable. Then I saw the comic and I couldn’t think for a few seconds.
    Then I started laughing.

    This is a terrible joke and a horrible comic but it’s incredibly funny. Its like watching someone trip and fall. You know you shouldn’t laugh but you can’t help it.
    Very dark comic but very good comic guys!
    Also I second the notion of turning this into a Christmas Card. Maybe add the Christmas Card lettering and turn it into a wallpaper?

  18. Bobipine says:

    It doesn’t really follow your usual standards, at least I think, it’s still pretty enjoyable, with the tears (turning into ice, showing they have been there for a little while), blood stains and obligatory XX eyes on the “Mother Penguin suit”… and again I can’t read what’s on the coverall. Maybe I’m turning into a “blindly approving anything you make” fan, hopefully not, I think not since I forgot to listen to the podcast this week (How dare I? I can’t even imagine a valuable excuse).. maybe try making a Kirby joke involving Maximum tomatoes and steroids, see if I would approve.. I probably would….

    got to love my long comments, hopefully I’m not alone

  19. Anon says:

    This is a really dark comic right here, yes it is…

    But if you look at Mario as a character, it seems quite normal. Mario kills hundreds of innocent goombas and koopas.
    And they are innocent. Tell me, have you have you ever been actively attacked by a goomba or koopa? No, they’re just walking, strolling even along.
    You know from the RPG’s that some of them would even like to help you on your quest.

    • The Gastronomic Gamer says:

      Those goombas seemed pretty intent on killing me in Mario 64.

    • roadjcat says:

      Have you played Paper Mario? They run up and jump on your head. The goombas at least. Sure you have Goombario who helps you, but most of the other goombas are evil. And Mario doesn’t kill them, he just like knocks them out. At least in Paper Mario.

  20. TheNinjaMouse says:

    D-: That was horrifying! I can’t believe that made it past your self-censorship! Is 2P Start still safe for children?! Think of the nightmares that will be conjured now every time a player gets the penguin suit in that game! How can you bear the guilt of having come up with such a horrific concept! Can you even look at yourself in the mirror?! Have you no shame? Have you no—OK, I laughed at it too. It’s just so over the top and ridiculous, you can’t take it seriously. SDBNCG (Surprisingly Dark But Nice Comic Guys). Perhaps this makes all of us 2P Start fans terrible, terrible people, but at least we admit it.

  21. Apkinesis says:

    Wow, I remember hearing about how Ray treats baby seals and their parents, but now the penguins? Not the penguins! D:

    But seriously, took several seconds for this comic to finally click (about when I made the connection between the large penguin suit and some crying little penguins), but it probably took me so long because I didn’t really expect this sort of humor from 2P START! It’s an interesting concept and great artwork as always, but admittedly, not quite aligned with my sense of humor this week.

  22. DrOswald says:

    I like. Good work.

  23. Mattalorian says:

    So… cold.

  24. freeplay says:

    between liking 47 panel ‘tweet the deets’ comic, not getting the joke, and being really in the mood for a tim and ray comic, this was a disappointment. But the artwork is great.

  25. roadjcat says:

    Like the art. I always like an ice motif. But the actual comic and joke is just wrong.

  26. Doopliss says:

    What a cold comic… Some of your coldest work. It wasn’t a very freasy idea to come up with, I thought it was pretty clever. A very ice comic. Your comments were pretty chilly billy, especially Ray’s. I finally saw the freezer for that Sonic game. Looks very Dr. Seuss.

  27. Jonny Niko says:

    I thought of Happy Feet and then saw this comic… My day is made.

  28. Doopliss says:

    By the way, wall paper please?

  29. FluffyPanda says:

    Not entirely sure that this fits with your PG-13 target… but I’ve not been 13 for a long time and I found it funny as hell.

  30. tustin2121 says:

    *cringe* Yeah, I’m gonna go on the side of “grossed-out” in this comic-goodness debate. Poor Penguins…. Now if it were baby seals…….. 😛

    Also, Eww…. Mario got into a dead Penguin?! What does he think it is, a Tauntaun??

  31. OMGITSJAD says:

    A surprisingly dark comic out of 2P Start!…
    Also, thanks for the zooming in feature, Internet Channel, Nice little Osh-kosh-b-gosh logo detail! Did Mario take Luigi’s overalls too?!(and how did he turn them red…?)

  32. D3vin says:

    All we have to figure out what Song Mario is whistling and we have this baby figure out… I’m guessing either the Mario theme or some ice level.

  33. Talduras says:

    Now that I got my fun comment out of the way (roughly 12 hours ago), time for me to put in some real feedback.

    As twisted as this is, which even you guys agree about, I will admit that even if this is a bit of a deviation from the 2Pstart style of humor in some regards, in many other ways it still bears the trademarks of what makes 2Pstart a great comic series that stands out in the crowded and often scary throng of video-game webcomics.

    For example, whereas another comic would likely stoop to blood splatter, gore, and even a murder weapon of some sort, you guys instead rely on the relative subtlety of some red footprints and crying penguins. And whereas another comic series might make Mario (and perhaps even the baby penguins) spew some over-the-top, rage-filled, profanity-laden dialogue, you guys instead fill the scene with a dread silence where only the whistling of a cruel Mario and the soft, heartbreaking cry of baby penguins can be heard.

    The summation of all of this is that even when the joke’s core is cold and cruel, you guys have class and respect in how you portray it. And this is why I salute you guys. =D

  34. I didn’t get this comic. Tim’s post helpfully explained that the penguin suit is a power-up in a game that has yet to be released here in the U.S. Maybe you guys could’ve waited until the game is available for purchase/play before running this one. Not all of us scour gaming web sites daily.

    • D3vin says:

      This is a comic about video games, it is suggested you have a basic knowledge of them before reading. It’s like showing a Mac-related podcast to a Windows or Linux user. Some things will get lost to the people who aren’t its target audience.
      [spoiler]OOOOHHH Burn! 😉 [/spoiler]

    • Ray says:

      It’s a valid point, though with such a highly anticipated game a week from release, and gameplay videos of the penguin suit readily available on the Wiis own Nintendo Channel, I don’t feel quite as bad.

      • BadnikHunter says:

        Plus, the penguin suit is shown in the original E3 trailer, and I’m pretty sure all the other trailers, so if you knew about this game you should have know about the penguin suit.

      • roadjcat says:

        I have no interest in NSMBWii and have not looked into it at all, I figured just on the way Mario was wearing it that it was a suit in the game…but maybe I somehow took notice of it because of the ads on gamefaqs which I am now noticing the penguin suit in. XD

      • FluffyPanda says:

        I haven’t followed the news for this game at all, so had no idea there was a penguin suit in it. But the comic didn’t leave me wondering at all.

        Sometimes a joke is funny enough without knowing the source and I think this stands on its own like that (assuming you know that mario wears all kinds of crazy suits, but then surely every gamer knows that). Tim’s comment had the side effect of educating me about mario’s latest fancy dress fetish.

        On the other side of the coin is this Penny Arcade strip:
        Beware, contains naughty words!
        which I thought it was just a rather rubbish joke until I realised that there actually was a razor marketed at gamers. Then I thought it was a rather lame joke about a truly hilarious product. So at least they pointed me to something funny, even if the joke fell flat.

      • FluffyPanda says:

        If you’re seeing ads on the web you aren’t doing it right.

        Get this:

        But remember to add to the exception list. The adverts here aren’t intrusive and they deserve the occasional click.

  35. Superfiver says:

    Yeah, very cold indeed. Mario 64 helps this comic in portraying how much of a Psycho Killer Mario really is. People thought it was just an innocent race between friends. Now the truth is revealed! But the real question is, how did Tim and Ray find out the truth??

  36. Wyrm says:

    2P start is clearly just on the leading edge of discovering the dirty dark secrets of Mario. First it was the fact that Mario clearly was using steroids, now Mario kills baby penguins.

    Too bad it’s just to cover up the fact that Tim and Ray can’t forgive Mario for making them gay.

  37. I’d be horrified too if Mario trampled my Heinz.

  38. D3vin says:

    I have always asked this but got no answers, Penguins are Black, not blue.
    Why are they blue?

    • roadjcat says:

      When did stars get eyes? When did these penguins in question gain the ability to write mystery novels and become “detectives”? It’s the Mario universe, it doesn’t have to make sense.

  39. GX Echidna says:

    Dang, this is going to really bother me. It seems pretty deliberate that Mario is humming a specific song, but what song?

  40. racefreak265 says:

    Do you guy’s really need to add on to the controversy this week? Modern Warfare 2 just came out, and it already has controversy surounding it with the airport killing scene, so you think its funny the next day to have Mario murder an innocent penguin mother? Thats cold.

    • Talduras says:

      Oh, there’s a lot more controversy than that surrounding Modern Warfare 2. I can think of three others, two of which are possible Black Doom candidates depending on how Ray/Tim perceive those instances (or if they even hear of them).

  41. tigerlord says:

    mario is whistling the nsmb theme.
    do dee do do, do do de do…

    • D3vin says:

      Is he hopping in the air every time that “bwoaa” sound plays?
      (like how all the items and enemies do?)

    • freeplay says:

      how did i mess that up?

    • Keiichi says:

      Isn’t it the second line of the first verse of the classic SMB tune?

      “Ba-da, ba, ba-da, bam, bam:
      Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba-da, ba-ba-ba-da, ba-da, ba, ba-da-da,
      Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba-da, ba-ba-ba-da, ba-da, ba, ba-da-da,
      (bom) ba-ba-da-da, da, ba-da-da, ba-da-da,
      (bom) [this line ? ] BA-BA-DA-DA, BA, BA, BA-DA!
      (bom bom) ba-ba-da-da, da, ba-da-da, ba-da-da, bam, bam bam…

  42. ultimateDK says:

    this comic feels strange on this website. id see it fitting better on bitf.

  43. Dr. Disaster says:

    I used to think Ray’s Adventures in Dating was the most disturbing comic. This one just took it’s place.

    • CKcheeseboy says:

      I think your avatar just took its place.

      Also…If you want it to be possessive, it’s just I-T-S, but if it’s supposed to be a contraction, then it’s I-T-APOSTROPHE-S…scalawag.

  44. Highwater Trousers says:

    Okay, I really didn’t get this comic at first. I had to read it several times and then I figured it out. I spy a nice little detail with one of the penguins – its tears have turned to icicles! Great comic, but now I’ll never look at Mario the same way. Ever. Well, if you ever get in trouble with PETA, I think I can help you guys out in court.

    *ahem* Your honor, I would like to defend Mr. Harding and Mr. Hargreaves. These men are not sadistic or sick or twisted. They are simply artistic and creative, and have a right to depict this march of a penguin. They could have very well done an image of Mario wearing a propeller, but do you know what would have had to happen? Well, Mario would have had to go and rip the propeller of a mother helicopter. How would you feel knowing that some poor helicpoter was lying on the ground without its propeller, its smaller children helicopter crying oil. Huh? Huh?!! In fact, this image is not offensive. It is an inspirational image that instills the values that children need in this day and age. Please see my completely undoctored evidence: (Sorry, couldn’t help myself.)
    Okay, maybe it was edited. But mainly for my sake, since even I could not understand their sheer brilliance at the time. Summing it up my fellow citizens, we should let these two men go and concentrate our energies on other problems. Thank you and good night.

  45. Zak says:

    I looked at this one and thought to myself:


    And that is my favorite kind of laugh. Well done, guys.

  46. RedZero says:

    Hey 2P, long time reader, first time commenter!

    If thats how they get the penguin suit, how do you get other power-us? Is the frog suit from SMB3 the results of some High School Bio class dissection gone wrong? Or the shell from NSMBds some kind of sick, twisted soup result? God, why doesn’t that work for me?

    • Doopliss says:

      If you say I’m “rising from my grave” you get a special mention in the podcast…

      • Talduras says:

        Not necessarily. I managed to get mentioned without saying that line (I didn’t listen to the podcasts much before posting that comment). HOWEVER, it’s worth it to say the line so that they play the recording: “Wise fwom your gwave!” Ah, good old low-quality speech audio. =P

      • Batty1580 says:

        Thanks Doopliss. Maybe this is why im ignored so much. Ive been commenting for what, two weeks now with no mention?
        If itll make you two happy then fine, ill say it. Ive now officially “risen from my grave”.

        There. Happy?

  47. 87392v says:

    I can just hear the nurse from Kill Bill whistling joyfully as she walks down the hall.
    That old Twisted Nerve! Haha!

  48. DrOswald says:

    Musical Misfits suggestion: Scrambled Egg Zone from Sonic 2 on the Game Gear

  49. reetva says:

    Why is it called “rising from your grave?” I mean, I get the reference and all, but I was never dead to begin with. If anything, I’m “emerging from the womb.”

    Now that that’s out of the way, I’m emerging from the womb. I’ve been reading the comic since… Since… Big Announcements, maybe? I really have no idea. The point is I like your podcast. And your comic. And your videos.

    What I’m trying to say is I think you guys do a good job. Actually, a great job. No, a wonderful job. I, uh… Just keep up the good work, okay?

  50. BlueBlur6036 says:

    I have finally risen from my grave! It has taken a long time for me and I don’t know why. I’ve been reading for a long time and listened to all the podcasts, yes I am an overachiever but it is a long walk to campus everyday. I really enjoy this comic for its great art and great humor and I cannot wait to see what you do next. Keep up the good work guys!

  51. Snifit says:

    Ok so not the greatest attempt, but I was under time constraints.
    A little holiday cheer for us all:

  52. Damian says:

    I hope most of these comments are sarcasm 🙂

    I quite liked the joke. The icicle tears were a very nice touch. NCG.

  53. HopeWithFeathers says:

    Hey so I’m Rising From My Grave (Que spooky music) and this is something I don’t usually do specially since I’m not really a gamer. Though I know absolutely everything about gaming thanks to my best friend since kindergarten. I love your podcasts and have listened to every one of them, which is why I don’t know which comic or podcast I started on. All I know is I started on one and went up (on my iPod thanks alot for the twitter comic by the way. I tried to zoom in for ten minutes before I finally gave up and went to a computer). Later I checked out the comics and loved them too. Anyway I think I started in July or something. Now I am finally caught up and commenting. The comic was especially cruel this week and i can’t figure out how to put a picture on my profile. Anyway I tend to ramble so nice comic and I look forward to many more, though hopefully not so freaky.

  54. Matteron says:

    hi guys ncg, sorry for not posting in a while, I guess I kind of fell back into my grave, but anyhow, what is written on his trousers.

  55. Dry Bones says:

    I just got a call from Charles Martinet. He’s-a call-a me-a to remind me to go pick up my copy of NSMB Wii on Sunday. That was exciting.

  56. CKcheeseboy says:

    Well, this comic inspired me to do another crappy photoshopped comic:
    Sonic Costume

    The “Hey Sonic” is there less because of joke reasons but more because it would be harder to take out. I’m lazy like that.

  57. Jason Berry says:

    Oh man!! so dark, but hilarious!! I love the little details. Like the bloody footprints and the penguins tears freezing. Great job guys. Funniest one in months.

  58. tekoa_rose says:

    Well, Here I am, rising from my grave. Which is really a sad thing to call a brand new comment-er. I mean? Rise from your grave? In order to rise from my grave, I would have to first be in my grave in order to rise from it? Which would mean I have to be dead? And now that I’m rising from my grave, that would make me undead. Are you calling me a zombie now? Or maybe you mean rise from your grave in a Jesus resurecting from the grave sort of way, that by rising from my grave I am now reborn into a new salvation of 2pstartdom. Is this some kind of crazy nerd religion? I mean, you’re cool and all Ray but come on, a zombie religion made of crazy zombie grave risers? Although when I think about this comic in that light its starting to make more sense. Maybe I should rethink this rising from my grave thing. I don’t want to be a part of this rising from your grave to worship ray and tim thing. Although I have a feeling I’ve already lost my husband to you crazy zombie nerds. I guess I might as well join you if I can’t beat you.

  59. kodykid168 says:

    heh, i like how the little penguine’s tears are frozen (even though tears don’t freeze)

    • CKcheeseboy says:

      Almost everything freezes if you get it cold enough. </science nerd>

      • On a similar note, did you watch Mythbusters recently where they dumped liquid nitrogen on a Christmas tree?

      • roadjcat says:

        The first two comments basically represent my thought processes upon seeing the penguin’s frozen tears.

        In response to the third (Gewurtraminer) comment, I didn’t see that, but I saw the Ham on the Street episode where they made ice cream using liquid nitrogen. And shattered various fruits and vegetables as well.

  60. Jake'm says:

    Epic. I can’t stop laughing XD

  61. s3jondoe says:

    so this is what happens when you do shrooms.

  62. Mirby says:

    That’s it. I’m calling PETA.

    Seriously though, this comic is awesome! Great job!

  63. TheSpaz179 says:

    I guess this means that there’s gonna’ be a PFP. (Pistols For Penguins)

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